If you are in a relationship, it is natural to feel a little jealous at times, especially if you have very strong feelings for your partner. Occasional jealousy is okay and may even add a little excitement and zest to the relationship. But what to do when this jealousy becomes more frequent and intense and even overwhelming? Most of us are unaware of how jealousy destroys relationships so easily. It begins as a tickle; just an uncomfortable tickle. But if left to foster, it can easily morph into something toxic and disastrous. In the article, we would share Strategies on Dealing with Jealousy in Intimate Relationships to save yourself and others involved from emotional pain and heartache.
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Express Your Jealousy in A Soft Way
If you feel that your partner is doing something that is making you jealous, you can express how you feel and talk to them in a mature way. You can also communicate it with humor, diplomacy, or directly as long as it is respectful. If you are humorous, you can joke about how insanely jealous you are when your partner pays attention to someone else. Laugh with them as you say this because it will take the pressure off the topic and will get the message across. When you are diplomatic, you can let them know that you love them a lot and know that they will never cheat on you. And if you are direct, just tell them that you trust them, yet cannot control your feelings and want them to consider how you feel.
Use The Rubber Band Technique
Put a rubber band around your wrist, and each time you start feeling yourself slip into jealousy, snap the rubber band. As Danielle Maack, Ph.D., a licensed clinical psychologist and Associate Professor in the Department of Psychology at the University of Mississippi, tells Bustle, the rubber band technique is a beginner’s tool that’s associated with learning how to better tolerate difficult emotions or thoughts. “This is usually considered a distress tolerance technique, one that helps you at the moment to have a chance to regroup. More specifically, individuals are asked to ‘snap’ themselves with the rubber band when experiencing overwhelming emotions as a reminder to stop, take a step back, and observe what’s happening.”
Consider The Ways Jealous Is Negatively Affecting You
It’s worth your time to think through how your jealousy is negatively affecting you as an individual. For example, being constantly on edge because your partner is talking to or texting someone isn’t healthy for you or your relationship. By fully coming to terms with how jealousy is changing you or making you behave and feel, you may be more apt to figure out how to get over jealousy and let it go.
Trust Yourself
The best thing that you can do is trust yourself. Trust yourself that you can love deeply and without any regrets. Trust yourself that your love will act like the anchor that will prevent your relationship from floating away. This is not easy, but ultimately when you trust yourself, you trust whatever comes. You feel confident that you will be able to manage even the most difficult situation, including a breakup or rejection.
Talk to your partner
“It takes a lot of courage and vulnerability to admit that you’re jealous,” Dr. Skyler says. But it’s important to do so—especially if you’re feeling it regularly because jealousy can be a sign that trust has been broken in some way, and you’re not feeling safe.
Rather than navigate those murky emotions on your own, bring your partner into the conversation. Sit down when the jealousy isn’t in full-force so your emotions aren’t running high. Then, tell them you want to talk and calmly explain what you’re feeling jealous about. “If there are valid signs in the relationship, name those pieces in a non-accusatory way,” Dr. Skyler suggests. They may not even be aware that the behavior was triggering you, and from there, the two of you can work to establish ground rules, or behaviors, that make both of you feel safe and happy in the relationship.
Be realistic
There’s no good in holding on to unrealistic expectations. Be realistic and relearn how a relationship is supposed to work. Tell yourself that you cannot control everything, especially not your partner. Because they are human, and they deserve to live independent lives outside of the relationship-one of the Best Strategies on Dealing with Jealousy!
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